Protected: This has been said so many times that I’m not sure if it matters.

October 29, 2008 at 11:42 am (Depression periods)

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Protected: How do you live with yourself knowing this is as good as it’s going to get?

October 13, 2008 at 4:57 pm (Depression periods, EVERYTHING)

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Edward Alexander Crowley a.k.a. Aleister Crowley.

October 12, 2008 at 4:50 am (Depression periods, Drama, Friends, Relationships)

Well… here we are… at the awkward age.

I’ll admit that I had a lot of plans today. But couldn’t bring myself to it. Some of the plans were canceled because I’m not brave enough. Some because it’s far too late, timing is very important but I stayed out too late, so in a way, it was good. And the truth is, I think it’s been the best birthday I’ve ever had, minus the rude awakening and drama in the wee early hours of my birthday.

Also, happy birthday to the late Aleister Crowley.

There were some things I wanted to reveal tonight but yeah, I think it can wait. Or be revealed in different ways later on. And maybe if I had come home before midnight, things would be a lot different right now, like I wouldn’t be here right now, writing.

And I’m glad for the people I got to spend it with.

“The last time you came through, oh darling, I know what you’re going through.” – Headfirst Slide Into Cooperstown On A Bad Bet by Fall Out Boy.

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Protected: I’m a stitch away from making it and a scar away from falling apart

October 11, 2008 at 11:19 am (Depression periods, Relationships)

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I must confess, I’m in love with my own sins.

October 10, 2008 at 9:53 pm (Blah blahs and yada yadas)

“These are your good years, don’t take my advice, you never wanted the nice boys anyway.”

Remember my research paper? Good times, good times.

Here’s a piece of literature review that I left out : LINK

“I don’t just want to be a footnote in someone else’s happiness.” – Headfirst Slide Into Cooperstown On A Bad Bet by Fall Out Boy.

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Brace myself and let go.

October 10, 2008 at 6:14 am (Blah blahs and yada yadas)

It’s 5AM on a Friday-spells-disaster morning. So tireddddd.

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I cast a spell over the West to make you think of me the same way I think of you

October 10, 2008 at 5:11 am (Depression periods)

I’m a last chance.

I’m a dead end.

I’m a stormy day.

I’m a black night.

I’m full of poison.

I’m empty.

I’m alive.

I’m dead too.

I’m frustrated.

I’m at ease.

I’m so much closer to the truth than it really is.

I’m now full of lies.

I’m drunk on the lie of happiness.

I’m sober on the depression of reality.

I’m trying too hard.

I’m not attempting.

I’m waiting for life to begin.

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Say my name and his in the same breath, I dare you to say they taste the same.

October 3, 2008 at 1:31 pm (Depression periods, Relationships)

I’m so sick of myself.

I’m so sick of who I am right now.

And more importantly, I’m so sick of letting you see it and getting frustrated at myself for it.

And I’m so sorry.

And I wish I knew the right words to say.

And because I don’t, it holds back every single thing.

I wish I knew what to do.

I wish I was out of this Sophomore Slump.

And most of all, I wish I wasn’t so invisible to you.

” I call on Jesus, but he didn’t check his phone today. Oh oh there’s my summer girl, I’ve been wantin’ her. I hear she’s got a boyfriend.” Miss California by Jack’s Mannequin.

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